I can sometimes come out with these one liners in public that can be toe curlingly embarrassing for those that are with me. For example on Christmas Eve at the Coop I was checking out my shopping and packing it in carrier bags when the girl on the till asks “What is this?” as she holds up a butternut squash.
“Vegetarian chicken” I reply giving my best attempt at totally dead pan face. I winked at the ATC cadet who was helping with the packing for charity as the girl swallowed the bait.
After 30 seconds of searching on her screen for the product code the teenage girl twigged and just gave me one of those looks over the rims of her glasses – pure distain. Good times!
Saturday Morning July 16th.
I refuse to be a doping cheat. My shallots are going to be baby talc free in The Lee Village Flower Show Vegetable Class 23 Open Section today. I am no drug cheat, although talc is still used to buff up most bulbs.
The weather has been rotten for the show today, but my shallots have been entered and staged in a tent that hopefully has not blown away in the gales. I am slightly concerned that I will be marked down on uniformity compared to the ones I see on the net – the ones I have exhibited look proper rubbish. I only entered the shallot class very last minute as my spuds were so poor this year.
We go back to find I have nailed not only the Visitors Veg section, winning the 1st prize of £1 and a certificate with RED type but I have scooped the Visitors Cup (by default, but a win is a win!). The cup is a huge lump of silver wear and looks the doggies swingers! I am stunned! Rather unfortunate choice of T-shirt too as I go up to receive my award.
A small step in the preparation for the veg show in Aylesbury in September.
It has been held back by halo blight breaking out in the climbing french beans.